Cosmic Driving Lessons

So it’s late spring, early summer, somewhere in the mid-1990s.  I’m driving from Kansas City to Emporia – and I shouldn’t be driving.  Sonja’s up front with me in my 1980 BMW, and Sky’s in back.  Sonja is asking “How do you know when you see a UFO?” and “What does it feel like?” and “Do you think I’ll ever see one?

I must be playing it pretty cool because I’m being allowed to drive, even though – like I said -I shouldn’t be.  I’m trying to keep the car on a straight path.

It’s getting pretty dark, so it’s well after sunset, and I see an orange light near the horizon ahead of us. Figuring it’s a plane heading for KC as we drive west, I say to Sonja, “That could be a flying saucer.  So it’s a technically a UFO, but only because we can’t tell from this distance what it is.  We don’t know if it’s a real flying saucer, so it’s an ‘unidentified flying object.'”

Then, some time goes by…

…and the next thing I know this craft of unimaginable proportions is flying diagonally across the median from left to right, passing directly overhead while I continue focussing on keeping the car on the road, and at the same time quickly noting that this thing is HUGE and tilted – and Sky leans forward and she and Sonja are looking up through the windshield screaming, “It’s a flying saucer! Ohmygodthatsaflyingsaucer!!!!” as I grip the steering wheel and pull to the side of the road, looking back through the rear passenger window to see the thing rapidly disappear into the distance.

Both Sky and Sonja are hyperventilating, breathing in an entirely different world than they’d ever seen before.  They had just watched a huge disk, low overhead and bigger than they could explain, rotating and revolving, tilted to reveal its underside – which they both described as a display of many small, white lights flashing in a synchronised pattern.

I missed it. I suppose I was being punished for driving when… well, like I said, I shouldn’t have been driving.  I do regret that, more than I can say.  Apparently our conversation may have been “overheard,” and a saucer moves in so that Sonja can see one – and she does, her first! – and Sky gets quite the visual treat, too.  But me?  I’m taught a hard lesson.

Fair enough.  Other than being taken aboard a craft, this was the biggest, the closest and clearest and most coherent saucer I’d been near, probably, and it passes directly overhead in plain view, and I miss it.

That’s what I get for being a crazy, stupid-ass driver.


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5 Responses to “Cosmic Driving Lessons”

  1. “Other than being taken aboard a craft” Are you neglecting to tell me something here? I read this line like 5 times to make sure I was reading it right. You’ve had the experience of being aboard a craft? When did this happen and I’m wondering why you never told me about this? Ok…I’m not your psychiatrist or counselor so there was never a need to tell me but I wish you would have. I really want to hear about your experience sometime. Well Stace, you sent a message on myspace that said you would be gone for awhile, I hope that just means from myspace. I hope all is well and that the sun still shines in Denver even if some days it doesn’t feel like it!!!


  2. Stace says:

    I’m just taking a hiatus from the other website. This one is demanding more of my attention, and with any luck – photos up tonight! That is, if Dustin comes through for me…(he’s the one who took the photo of the landing traces in my IIC photo folder on myspace).

    More about being aboard a craft when things calm down on the home front. For now just know it’s not something I resent or feel was ultimately negative – but not all sunshine and butterflies either. Just a part of “life.”

  3. Stace –

    Question, why do you state that you shouldn’t be driving? Is there more to this story that I’m missing?

    Please – Lemme know,

  4. Stace says:

    Mike, I’m embarrassed to spell it out, but there’s no sense in trying to gloss over reality or euphemise the implications. So, I was intoxicated. Everyone knows it’s stupid and dangerous to drink and drive, but we often forget that when our judgment fades. So the moral of the story goes far beyond stating the obvious. Worse things – terrible, devastating things – could have happened than me missing the full spectacle of the UFO flyover. Bottom line: I feel that the occupants of that craft were “driving home the message,” so to speak, that they didn’t approve of my choice either.

  5. Sonja Willms says:

    My dear friend Stace, in no way shape or form did I feel our lives were in danger with you driving tipsy. I do however recall that evening spent at your parents and the few glasses of wine that were indulged in, we were making merry! I feel to this day very honoured to be a part of that evening. I had never seen a UFo and wasn’t completely 100% sure of their for lack of a better word, “realness”. That evening I saw a very large disc with a certain top and bottom seperated by hundreds of bright white lights. I remember being so excited and sharing this with Sky as we saw the craft tilted on its side, screaming for excitement and joy. I rarely see them now, and I haven’t seen you in almost 20 years but I know they are there. Your friend Sonja

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